So Many Different Beginnings.

A.J. from beginning to now
 as the journey goes on.....

We all begin our journey from mismatched perspectives, with pathways all heading in different directions, and yet we can still connect together and relate in a way that will bind us.

Everyone has a story to tell, although unlike the 'standard' family's tales, those of us with our adorable quirky kids can tell an amazing array of stories like no other.

Ours was one, showing a family torn apart and shattered, after receiving the knowledge our own grandson was in crisis and needed our support. Stepping in and fighting with all of our very being, everything and anything we had, to gain the right to care for him in the way he rightly deserves, as does any and every child.

Guiding that same young child from the tender age of two into his teenage years, while learning of his lengthy multiple diagnosis, supporting him every step of the way, through understanding and acceptance.

Together while facing his demons, and make a full 180 degree turnaround from what was experienced on those very first days.

Showing that anyone can achieve the very best outcome, with a little patience, hard work, and a lot of love.

I won't deny how hard it was, although nothing is easy if you're really determined for the best outcome.

As we settled into this year's routines, as with each year, we pondering on the years gone, what was good, what went wrong, how the past years have been for our family, and how we could make things better!

Being determined to strive to work hard to have great lives and gain more than we already have.

As we review I can honestly state that 2015, and 2016 so far, have been good to us, for the first time in a long time we had direction purpose and positivity.

So many things had finally fallen in place for A.J. academically and socially.

We were so pleased with his high school transition, seeing the whole experience helping A.J. to turn a very important corner, and step forward into the first of his teenage years, in a positive light.

So many highlights for our family were experienced, although many may look and say,

"Ohh that's just another day for us, nothing important there",

Although for our family being able to say "we had a normal day" is a big thing.

I don't want to be the centre of attention to anyone, I don't want any "special treatment",

what I do (and always have) wanted is to be able to join in with normal life experiences in the same manner that everyone else can and have done.

.........."So, If you don't want attention, why are you sharing your story? " - I hear you ask.........

Well, to be quite honest, it has been for two reasons ......

1/. Therapeutic.

-when I first began our journey with A.J. the experiences caused many different emotional feelings,

being in an area I didn't understand or know how to deal with, I was in a very confused state wondering what to do and how we would be able to cope to give the best outcome for him.

I put everything into searching and researching the different topics and diagnosis, correlating everything in order, to what was required and how it would be instigated.

After I finally set everything out I became so settled and relaxed I realised it was just the right thing I needed to help calm my nerves and stabilise my emotions, so I decided to delve in further researching more and more.   

2/. Sharing to support others.

-after realising how difficult it was for our family to gain understanding and support for A.J.

without having any information given to us at the time of receiving his diagnosis, and how hard it was to know where we should actually start to support him in those initial years, I knew I needed to help others by making that support available to them, providing guidance and understanding and any help they need to get on their feet and take their first steps.

When setting up the Nanna's Touch ASD Support page, my thoughts were based more on an online information access page. A place to share important information and vent about the usual day-to-day experiences, while helping others to know they're not alone and we're all going through the same or similar things, and we can all make it through.

After correlating all my documentation together from all the different areas I had accessed, and adding our own experiences, I was convinced to put it all together into a novel form.

Once again while doing all this I could see and feel the therapeutic value I was gaining personally and it didn't take much coercing to also include this with my knowledge.

To put it more into perspective I found a blog site to set up for my own personal story, then connect it to my other page.  

Knowing how many people for various reasons can be confronted with low moments in time due to emotional imbalance, sometimes it can be a real struggle to get things into perspective, causing a physical and/or mental breakdown.

We can all face this, no-one is immune from the likelihood of a melt-down, we have all had 'that moment' when it all seems too much and too hard to get past. Although while generally most days are a breeze, we can still be confronted with days that just won't let you go, pulling you further and further into darkness.

I too have faced these type of days, moments of feeling crushed and broken, showing another reason why I was so determined to establish this venture,

One day in particular, a while ago, after being bluntly told.....

 ...."your not doing anything beneficial with your life".... plus a few other demeaning comments,

 I could see myself spiraling into a state of depression, it hit home that I was on the verge of suffering a form of breakdown, and I knew I couldn't let that happen.

My family needed me, and I needed to be there for them.

I shared a post at that time to my personal page and will share it here with you, to clarify that.......

.......it is OK not to be okay. 

I'm done............... I'm broken.............time and time again I have given and supported unconditionally without expectations; and repeatedly I have been taken for granted and not appreciated for the generosity and time I have sacrificed.

I feel hurt that all I've done and all I am, can mean nothing to the people I personally gave so much to and for!

Putting on hold my needs for the sake of those more in need; only to have it ignored and not seen for what it is.

Brushed aside like trash and garbage; or have it treated as though it is 'expected'!

Without gratification or acknowledgment!!!!! 

Things I have done out of love, that have been turned and twisted then interpreted as interfering and 'butting in'; when there has been no forthcoming from others to do those things that needed to be done by SOMEONE!!!!

I cannot understand how the selfishness of others can make an act of generosity so meaningless and worthless!!

I have never wanted or expected anything in return other than acceptance, support, and acknowledgement of what needed to be done.

I feel abandoned........ rejected......drained...... crushed!!!!!

Anyone that knows me.... truly knows me..... as the person I am.... knows that though I have nothing, I would willingly give to others.... refusing to take for myself......because that is who I am!

Sorry.... vent over...

Although the original comments had my personal worth shattered by the negativity; I needed to prove to myself that I am capable of doing something real and worthwhile.

After sharing that post, I was supported by the "loyal" friends I have, by highlighting what they saw as my real self worth. It turned me around and strengthened my resolve to strive for what 'I' truly believed in.

Using my strength and personal understanding in the matters relating to Autism, special needs, and other areas, has given me the drive to share my experiences with others, those needing to know and understand the personal side, not the clinical text book theories.

You don't have to be perfect, there is no such thing as perfect,

We are all students of Life, learning something new each and every day.

To deny that is not being true to yourself.

We all have a new lesson to learn, when meeting others that can teach us, we may be the one to help them learning their new thing.

It's a perfect circle of knowledge.