Homework - Am I doing the right thing???!!!!

A.J. and Myself,

we have a great bond together

I am just another person, no-one special, someone taking each day as it comes, facing the same issues as everyone else, at times struggling to make ends meet, and definitely with no idea of what is going to present itself tomorrow or the next day.

At times we have, and still do, struggle to understand the whole picture of what A.J. has been and is still going through; and with his additional needs, why it had been so hard to gain those much needed supports early on, fighting for every piece of assistance and understanding.

For that very reason I stepped up and did what any loving caring 'parent' would do and sought out whatever he needed, gaining anything and everything that I thought would help to better his chances to be an active participant in "Life".

Throughout A.J.'s different stages, we had to repeatedly justify his need for additional aids. Living in a somewhat remote area, outside the city dynamics where many resources and services are easily accessible, we had to source out and adapt alternate solutions.

We were determined to connect with something/someone that would help with each separate issue.

In general we enjoy the adventure, love the progress and joy our little one gives, although we agree there are still those days that can take its toll on our emotional and physical being, and I'm quite willing to admit sometimes days are so 'arggghhh' that I just want to pull my hair out and scream... No matter what we do in those times, we can't seem to find a way to get things running smoothly.

One of those said moments are when we face the dreaded "HOMEWORK", and for us this seems to have some horrendous effect on A.J. and nothing I do to help makes any difference.

The concept of this specific requirement whether it is involving assignments, essay formation, general worksheets, or writing down his own thought or verbal knowledge, trying to find the right information, then deciphering what is required from the information he may have found, or more precisely, having the ability to re-write texts into his own words and expression form, suitable to the specific requirements for his school work, seems to be too difficult to achieve.

Where does he look ..How much does he need ..What parts should he use ..How does he set it out?

When you are over-analysing every step along the way, this can be stressful in itself.

The stress from thinking about all of this becomes so overwhelming he shuts down completely and can't focus on anything at all.

-These are the moments many don't see or understand.

-These are the moments when others have assumed our kids are 'lazy' or just 'making excuses'.

-These are the moments that we 'the parents' have to pick up the pieces.

So how do we help, without doing the work ourselves.

How do we gain support, when others seem to be oblivious to the obvious.

How do we help, when looking at the question format and wonder what level of education they're based on...... University!!!

We're continually told, he's doing so well, he can do it by himself......

......but what is it that he's really doing?

How do we know if he really understands and comprehends the 'big picture' of all he's involved in?

He's not stupid... he's far from it....

Although that doesn't help if we're not being informed he's struggling to gain the key knowledge in the classroom, do we assume it's due to the teachers being unaware, is he flying under the radar to those around him as to what he understands and what he needs support with. What do we do next, if he's not gaining the correct additional supports and assistance needed in these areas.  When his mind is so full of everything and anything around him, as he struggles to filter out the different noises and lighting distractions that the natural environment presents, and becoming distorted, leaving him strained and worn out before he has even begun to focus on the necessary things required of him at any given time.

A little light within this long never-ending tunnel has come in the form of our NDIS inclusion, allowing access to funding and resources that may help to 'alleviate' some of the issues A.J. faces.

These resources are based around access to an O.T., Speech Therapist, Autism Psychologist, and Physiotherapist; all working together, focusing on what is best needed to help A.J. gain a little balance and harmony within his own tormented body and mind.

Access to these people and the services they provide will help A.J. to self-regulate his sensory dysfunction and control how he reacts and relates to his surroundings.

This in turn will enable him to gain a little control and focus on what is most important for him in that moment, and then help him to understand and cope with school involvement, peer connections, and more; then full circle back to the issue at hand 'managing his Homework'.

Always know there are supports and help out there, don't let it go, stand up and ask questions, demand the answers. Find your local contacts to help you find the supports your child needs.