Coping with the little things

The first thing we need to do as a parent of a special needs child, is to learn about, understand, and accept what lay before us. As we grow together we will adjust with the progress, by gaining knowledge and addressing the situations our little munchkins face; by acknowledging 'all' aspects including 'additional' symptoms, and concerning issues.

Accepting we will struggle with different concepts, we can still maintain a normal lifestyle without needing to “change” who our child is.

We can learn and teach our child to sense any pre-signs of melt-downs or sensory moments, to help them gain and maintain stability within their personal environment.

Once we accept ways to 'better' our lives and lifestyle, by implementing different services and resources, making better choices by setting out a structured routines and roster system, allowing everyone to find their place within the family network, it will then result in gaining complete balanced harmony throughout the home environment.

When that's done it will give us the confidence to extend these initiatives into other areas our child is involved in, such as schools, etc.

Remembering this may sometimes be a bigger struggle than our first step, although it can be accomplished when you have a well set-out plan and willingness to persevere and be totally committed to the end result.

We also need to be understanding and give consideration to any additional mental health issues that may be faced by any of our family members.

I know as you are reading those words, many of you will cringe and shudder; “yes” I said the 'Mental Health' words.

While covering this specific topic, we must also discuss the fact that, as parents, we face many additional circumstances ourselves, on top of those general run-of-the-mill family situations, and we may also find ourselves venturing into the domain of this specific area.

No matter how organised and prepared we can be, we will face 'moments' or 'meltdowns', when we can't cope, needing to release our frustrations in some way.

This doesn't necessarily mean anything is 'wrong', just that we are 'human' and we've simply come to a point where our body is saying 'enough', I need a break or down-time.

Realistically, finding the time needed to take a step back from all the hustle and bustle of life is hard enough, but taking a real break from 'everything' when we're having to deal with the bigger picture, is something most of us wouldn't even assume would be possible. Saying that, we 'do' have to find a way to balance out everything we are confronted with, to allow ourselves the time to focus on 'us'.

Allowing ourselves this elusive down-time in some form, to regenerate our emotions and physical being, enables us to also regroup our thoughts to face another day.

Looking after ourselves, our health, diet, sleep, exercise, and socialising, sometimes we can still all get into a 'rut' and before we realise it we're so consumed with what the household needs, we forget about ourselves. We need to understand that if we are not functioning as a whole we cannot be the best 'us' we need to be for our family.

As we begin the home-run to yet another years ending, it can be the best time to put this into action. You may not be able to have a 'holiday' as such, but look at your life in a positive light and see what you can do for yourself.

Choose from a 10 minute break, allowing yourself to have a proper relaxing bath, take a walk, or do some gardening or activity you enjoy; or maybe something more in-depth by arranging a babysitter so you can gain a couple of hours and go out for tea, or anything else 'you' would like to do.

Also allow some quality time as a family to do something relaxing, without the pressure that is constantly demanded with time schedules, routines and expectations from the weekly meetings, appointments and other stressful commitments; by going to the park or pool/beach/river with a picnic lunch and games, or just do nothing and chill out completely at home watching movies, playing board games and more.

While addressing Mental Health and emotional well-being in our lives, we must accept no-one is completely immune to the effects no matter how well prepared we believe we are, and if we find ourselves confronted with our own personal experience going down the path of uncertainty, we need to acknowledge it and find supports to help us get through it .

The smallest of things may upset us, we could become frazzled for no obvious reason, if this happens we need to notice these and any other signs, anything that is different to how we normally cope with daily situations, and take measures to deal with them.

Stress and Anxiety is not a sign of weakness.

Having someone to talk to is the first step, whether it be a family member, friend, or maybe a professional; but never never ignore these early warning signs.

Happiness and Calm to all xxxx

If you need assistance always contact your medical advisers or call 

beyond-blue 1300 22 4636 - or - Lifeline 13 11 14