Supportive and Nurturing ways to Socialising......

socialising the best way for the child
(picture from clipart)

The one thing I continually stress and worry about with A.J. is the interactions he has/doesn't have with his peers. Knowing how he still struggles with the correct verbal expression in relation to his conversation with others.

Without knowing the context of what is appropriate and expected verbal banter, having his own format of using unconventional conversation content for expressing his opinion and lifestyle, totally confusing and bewildering anyone not use to this form of interaction.

What he perceives as his fantasy style world and the belief that a reality can exist between both, blending them as one, being far from what true reality is, therefore when expressing his understandings and beliefs of all this onto others he may be portraying himself as a bit eccentric.  

As our children grow up, becoming older, and not depicting that "cute little boy/girl" look anymore, others will also assume they should "grow up and get over that whole Autism thing"

Many believing it to be a children's diagnosis, not realising, like other diagnosis, such as Diabetes, Asthma, Epilepsy, and so on, it doesn't just 'go away', it is a life-long disability that requires permanent on-going assistance and care to help the person to maintain a reasonable standard of living.

This is when they truly need the complete understanding from others and an acknowledgement to what they are experiencing.

Everyone has their own way of sharing and expressing their knowledge, feelings, emotions, likes, dislikes, and more. We all have the right to the way we do this, as long as we do not intentionally offend or harm other people when doing so.

If others can gain an understanding to these issues -

-sometimes ASD people may feel 'too' much, causing the overload of emotions that they are unable to control.

-Just because Autistic's struggle to express the way they feel in the same manner as others, does not mean they have no feelings, or have the wrong feelings.

-if others can't understand the behaviour and mannerisms of an ASD person, what they are doing or why they are acting 'out of the ordinary' or different to what the neurotypical person perceives they should behave,
it would be ideal to find out the facts rather than judge wrongly.

-these issues and situations do not give others the right to respond negatively in return.

  

No-one has the right to demean or degrade another person for any reason.

Being rude, mean or an out-right bully, stating they are different, weird, or stupid, laughing at them, believing they don't matter, then justify it by thinking they won't understand what is happening, is not an excuse.

Seeing the pain and hurt in their eyes when something happens tells the story, the truth, that Autistic kids/adults do have feelings and emotions, they feel the hurt and pain of words and rejection, it changes them.

They may shutdown, isolating themselves more and more, believing that everyone will react and behave in a similar manner, rejecting them completely, so feeling it is all too hard to handle.

As sad as this is, it happens, it's Bullying at it's worse.

Educating the masses that Bullying is wrong, towards anyone, in any form.

Educating this, has to become more than just saying we are doing something.

Actions speak louder than words.

Focus instead on teaching others what truly matters.

Showing how to assist any and every child to feel comfortable and included within every situation and setting they enter.

Finding ways to help our children relax in an environment outside their safety zone, where they can feel safe and confident while also being able to socialise with others.

The best way this can be achieved is when there is no pressure to do so.

Supporting and assisting them to gain ways of bonding together with a special friend, for no other reason than wasting time doing silly things, shutting off and ignoring the bigger world around them, and being able to focus only on what that moment holds.

Community based social activities are the ideal setting, many using creativity craft and art style classes to help to more easily express their feelings and emotions, helping others to gain an awareness of their expression styles, and becoming the first stepping stones to achieving the goals of understanding.

Supporting the child, and the family, to help them grow.