Living and Growing in Today's Society....

While facing different daily struggles, issues deemed by others as irrelevant, some completely consuming, and some that will cause the strongest of families to crumble,

Some days just don't make sense

Some days result in a big lot of set-backs  

Some days we just can't wait to end, so we can start again tomorrow

Some days see our man sinking inside himself, sitting there frozen, staring off into space, unable to function at all.

When all looks calm and settled on the surface, inside he may be screaming with confusion and disorientation. Being unable to focus or concentrate due to the fog and turmoil taking over his every thought process. That's the times when others can't understand or comprehend why the sudden outburst of emotional overload happens.  

So much has been thrown at him, imploding, and yet with all that he has endured, he still rises the next day, fresh and clear, prepared for whatever the universe will present to him.

All of this due to our family's attitude and commitment, one that gives A.J. the strength to face each day as a normal child with loving, caring, supportive and encouragement from all of us.

Facing each day, as with all our children and grandchildren, we have no excuses, no exceptions, just learning and growing, as he should do, to gain and become who and what 'he' dreams of being.

Living in today's demographics, we are faced with so many additional variables than ever before. So many of today's 'norm' become a deterrent, rather than assisting the areas needed to support our kids.   

Sometimes my grandson will state he wished he was alive in the 1970's /80's. He feels he would be more adept to their ways of living, without the demands and expectations of today's lifestyles.

While pondering to how A.J. would think this way,
someone stated,  -"but Autism is more understood and accepted now than back then"

Yes that may be true, although the whole 'nanny state' mentality that has completely taken over, has deprived our kids of some of the most basic and necessary lifestyle aspects that could help them manage and cope with their symptoms and diagnosis a little easier.

Such as climbing trees, jumping logs, building cubby-houses from wood blocks and sticks etc, being outside in the fresh air and just 'being a kid'.  

So fearful of 'failure' or 'injury' we are prone to wrap our kids up and restrict their involvement in the areas best suited to assist their sensory needs and so much more.

Below is a notation so aptly written, by a mum who's child today is 21+ years old.

She has a group link on Facebook called Kerri's Korner and has over the years shared many of her stories through posts, blogs, books and other mediums, regarding the ups and downs of how her child with Aspergers faced the outside world.

I personally gained much strength in the early days from her notations and guidance.

Knowing we too will one day reach the outcomes they have achieved,

understanding how to 'make it' in this big scary world!

From -  Kerri Stocks @Kerri's Korner   

To all the parents who are currently going through turmoil I offer you my mindset theories that have bought peace at the end and made a wonderful human being:

1) Allow your children to experience emotional pain and discomfort - only then can they learn how to handle society.

2) Allow your child to learn the answer NO! - only then can they learn how to handle it.

3) Allow your child to go their own path - don't allow system based institutions change who your child ultimately is - they are not right!

4) Allow your child to learn chores - they are after all going to leave your nest and need to learn them.

5) Allow them to have downs - only then can they experience ups.

6) Allow others to say what they want - and ignore them because it is simply an opinion, it is not facts.

7) Allow yourself to learn who your child really is - and not get tied up in man made labels - they won't matter when your child has grown into adulthood.

8) Allow them to have downtime - a day off school can do much more than attempting to force them to fit the 'bars' of a structure that is fluid and forever changing. School is only a tiny element of their lives - don't allow it to control or dictate what their journey will be - they will get there even if it is a bit later than the 'sheeple' that seem to 'get it'.

9) And finally - in the end - all you have is your family - they are your beautiful children, so don't allow anyone else to fill their ego in thinking they know more than 'you'.........their parent.