a Positive Outlook......

At the beginning of this Year I decided it will be the beginning of a new era in many ways.

Determined that we open the chapter on a positive note and with the foresight to awareness of every step and stage, knowing that issues can and will arise, although this time being on the frontline to assure that A.J. will maintain stability and his rights will be taken into consideration.

So far I can honestly say my determination hasn't wavered and we are still forward progressing in many areas.

Living in what has become a fast-paced world, rushing here and there trying to get everything to fit into the busy schedules we have so easily forced ourselves into; we seem to have forgotten about the little things, the simple pleasures in life that can make us smile and relax for no other reason than enjoyment.

‘Our family’ definitely has been in hectic mode, especially over the past few years with the continual issues and ‘supposed’ dramas we’ve had to cope with. Then add the usual regular appointments, meetings, therapies, and so on, and it becomes obvious we are all but drowning trying to keep our heads bopping above the tide of emotional turmoil.

With this year being a positive experience for our family so far and wanting to keep a calm environment; although easier said than done, I set out all our requirements to assess and systematically re-plan appointment dates, etc, allowing time to fit in those all-important time-out moments, and some official family time (and ME time) to focus on the positive side.

A day in the park, movie night at home, just sitting around the coffee-table chatting about everything and nothing, playing cards or other board games; with so many ways to interact without it costing a cent, there isn't any excuses.

The benefits of having a break from a few of the more regular routine appointments etc, and having free-time for a change, last weekend I set my sights on my sewing/office room, trying to rearrange everything to be more time efficient and organised for my blog, sewing and other plans; with A.J. on my tail most of the time due to adjusting to his changed routine and the loss of his Asus android tablet (being damaged beyond repair), I find the drone of his voice right behind me involving replays of all his favourite games and how he interacts with each different app, the main one being of course ‘Minecraft’, it is very disappointing as he had some amazing worlds and constructions saved on them.

                              

Deciding now is a good time to begin teaching A.J. the finer points of health and fitness, so I have set out a plan to venture out to our local park for a quick paced trek around the path walkways for a fitness regime. Not knowing how long this will last, especially with the school routine becoming more and more demanding, although if just for the social outing concept we are definitely enjoying the experience.

The highlights and lowlights of being at highschool, after 8 weeks A.J. has confronted many challenges and hurdles already, he is however still enjoying many moments and relaxed with the knowledge that…………..

“They understand my WEIRDNESS”

Facing my first IEP meeting, with a hazy memory of past meetings consisting of feeling intimidated due to the confrontation effect by a group of officials all facing me, with high expectations and dictating unrealistic demands.

I walk in to see A.J.’s head teacher from the support unit, and me. In the casual atmosphere I am asked my opinion regarding his ability and if he would cope with the format set out for him. Such a pleasant surprise!

I then received more positive news with the reviews from his mainstream teachers (something that will be regularly updated) they all stated he was, settling in and  joining in conversations although “going off-topic at times” and needing assistance to focus; being acknowledged also for his “sense of humour”, as a positive outlook. Although struggling to join group activities in science with the teacher stating his reason for doing ‘sole’ work being…

“When I discover the Cure for Cancer, I want to take ‘all’ the glory”

Arriving home I received a letter in the post reading-

A.J. has been awarded the……

TEACHER’S COMMENDATION

For ‘ACTING SAFELY’

Such a proud parent moment!

A.J.’s school routine is definitely settling in well, so now the influx of homework/assignments.

Having very minimal involvement with the actual format of the essay writing process, or the concept of expressing his own words in written form; he is struggling to stay focused, his mind continually wandering, becoming tired and unsettled after such big days at school, and then the signs appear showing his symptoms of pre-meltdown mode.

Knowing how he is managing the simple things, we then face the reality when he becomes overwhelmed by the pressure to do out-of-the-norm activities, with the expectation to complete assignments about topics he has no knowledge of, while struggling to then express it in his own words, in a minimal set time.

We break each section down, separately, hoping he will manage each step easier, although still confused to the concept he is faced with.

Number one assignment - geography – World Heritage Listing and Sites (he has 3 weeks)

Choose an international site on the heritage listing and create a tourist brochure, and then write a letter to persuade the UNESCO committee to keep the site permanently on their listing.

He chooses a site – Canterbury Cathedral, he finds the information on Google and reads the words, so many words, “how do I choose the right words, why can’t I use those words………...”

Crumbling under the pressure of an expectation he doesn’t know how to cope with, he just releases his emotions and “what’s the point of this, I can’t understand……………...”

Lots of breaks, assuring calm words, more discussions and lots of persuasive assistance and he finally gets it done. He is so relieved and happy that he finally had it ready to hand in.

With only one day between, he is faced with yet more work,

His second assignment – PDHPE – Relationships and Self-Esteem

“And why do I have to do it now? I need a break first…...”

Assuring him we will break it down, with seven sections, one for each day before it is due, we finally sit as A.J. reads part one - Construct a Collage to Define your Sense of Self.

Hmmm this will be Interesting!!!

A.J.-“How can I make a college?”

Me-“No hunn it’s a COLLAGE”

A.J.-“Well that’s silly, what does that mean??”

With a simple explanation to what pictures and items he can put together I leave him at the computer to gather and download a list of pictures to represent the things he enjoys……such as Minecraft; the TV show ‘the Big Bang Theory’; Lego Ninjago; Sony Playstation 3; journals and pens; pictures of himself, our family, our dog, etc; school logo; the meaning of A.J. and more….

With a few little breaks to stretch and move around we finally set most of it on the computer allowing extras to be added as we find more.

Another day and now part two -

-define Self Esteem and identify four factors that influence our sense of self.

After spending the next half hour ‘literally’ finding the most comfortable of BLACK pens, I then try to decipher what it all actually means in a way that A.J. understands.

As the stress builds up ….for me….. I see A.J. squirming, confused, and so we go to Google, yet again, and search for ‘Self Esteem’……and once again go through the process of explaining how to re-word what he has found in his understanding.

After a long and drawn-out drama of why he has to do it and a break to regain his composure, he then writes out ‘in his words’ what he feels about ‘his’ self-esteem

“My self-esteem is generated by accomplishing to differ the most common activities of other people. I have good self-esteem because - I am not a jock running around a field like a blood thirsty turkey with a football. I have a real head on my shoulders, I’m a good person with good Karma; I’m an Individual!!!”

And with that he got up from his chair and stated for all to hear, head high and proud,

“I am not a follower, I’m a leader!!!”

I took a deep breath, wiped the tear from my eye and said “I’m so proud of you”

And I put my arms out for a hug, with A.J.’s response, a slight snuggle and a pat on my shoulder saying “there, there”

And so another day has ended and tomorrow will begin the next journey to explain -Why!!!